LITTLE ROCK, AR – There was a day when dinner time was family time, but cell phones have changed that and now, parents are in the hot seat.
Fox 16’s Donna Terrell went to two different restaurants, Chuy’s and Mellow Mushroom, where families typically go.
Video captured through cell phone shows several tables where parents stayed on the phone–talking, texting or surfing the web. Some parents during the whole meal.
“I don’t normally do this,” said Jennifer Walker who was with her mom and three kids. She rarely put down her phone. “There’s a reason for that,” she said. “Not that I’m defending myself.”
Another family was caught in the act. The dad putting down one phone and bringing out a second one.
In a study, Boston Medical Center sent observers to fast-food restaurants to watch family interactions. Of the 55 groups, the majority of parents were on their cell phones. The more focused they were, the more the children tended to act up.
This behavior from parents is becoming more noticeable. Even a comic strip pokes fun showing a father taking his son to the park. When asked what games they were playing the son responded, “Watch dad stare at his iPhone.”
“We all need to be reminded of just how important we are to our own kids,” said Mary Ekdahl, a child psychologist.
“Lots of research showing when families have mealtime together, those mealtimes are protective in the sense that children are less likely to have a number of behavioral and psychological problems just from that variable alone,” she said.
Dr. Adam Benton said technology is hard to resist but, “It’s a parent’s responsibility to model self regulation of that and show and demonstrate how to set the phone aside and prioritize family during mealtimes.”
Father Joshua Carrol said he gets it, but the phone is often used at dinner to synchronize family schedules, to not miss things like their son’s baseball games.
“There’s no doubt interacting one on one with your child is the best way to not only teach them how to interact with others and also form better relationships but if we make it late to his baseball game, he won’t forgive us for that either,” said Carrol. When asked if he need his cell phone, Carrol responded, “Absolutely.”
Back to Jennifer Walkers, her children seemed unphased.
“Well you know it’s not abnormal it didn’t bother me,” said Gareth.
“It really isn’t all that uncommon,” said Rhys.
Walker said she rarely uses her phone at dinner, but tonight was different. “This is the first time i got to sit down with my mother and show her my pictures from my trip.”
“It’s okay to text. It’s okay to use your phone. It’s not an absolute kind of request but just notice more that they are making time everyday just to give some individual attention,” said Dr. Ekdahl.
Walker’s son rowan sums it up. “I really don’t care. It’s her business. She can do what she wants.”
To read Adam Benton, Ph.D. and Mary Ekdahl, Ph.D., Licensed Psychologists at Arkansas Families First, LLC., article, “Is Your Cell Phone Coming Between You and Your Children?”, click here.
For more on this topic, click the following links:
Cell Phone Addiction: Parents Glued To Smartphones Have ‘More Negative’ Interactions With Their Kids